Learning to Celebrate the Small Steps. : 2019

Wednesday, November 27, 2019

Kindness ALWAYS Wins

One day, Brittney my stepdaughter,shared with

me a story about someone she knew at school who had lost their daughter. I could only imagine what a brave mom this woman must be to live on without her precious child. Little did I know when I heard Kelly and Caitlynn’s story that I would soon have an unbreakable bond with them.

Kelly lost her beautiful daughter on
September 14, 2017. Caitlynn was
19 years old when she passed away. She
was a vibrant and loving young person.

Caitlynn enjoyed baking cupcakes, playing sports and

watching movies, especially the scary ones. She was a

lifeguard and managed to be very charitable during her

short time on earth.

I never had the privilege of meeting Caitlynn. However, I

did have the pleasure of meeting her mom, Kelly.

After meeting Kelly, I read Caitlynn’s Facebook page named

Caitlynn’s journey. It was very apparent to me how many
lives Caitlynn and her mom had touched. They are
obviously loved by many.

Kelly started Caitlynn’s Random Act of Kindness. She had

cards with Caitlynn’s name on them and passed them out for

others to pay-it -forward by doing a Random Act of Kindness in

Caitlynn’s memory. I remember thinking to myself, “WOW!!!

What a great way of remembering her sweet daughter and to

spread kindness in her honor.”

https://www.facebook.com/caitlynnsjourney/

On May 24, 2018 I lost my daughter, Meghann. Several months
later, I was reminded by Brittney, of Caitlynn’s journey.

There is no way anyone can GET OVER a death of a loved one.

Sometimes the best way to MOVE ON from a loss of any kind is to do

something that will help others.

I wanted to do something in Meghann’s honor that would possibly last for

years and bring a smile to someone’s face. I believed that over the 30 years

that Meghann graced this earth she was responsible for making a lot of

people smile with her friendly, and loving personality as did Caitlynn.

I also believe that by providing others with a Random Act of Kindness

and bringing a smile to their day would give me a glimpse into Meghann’s

smile again. After all, isn't that why we are here? To love one another.

And don’t we all need to smile more often and feel loved?

https://www.facebook.com/caitlynnsjourney/

In honor of Caitlynn we are going to pay-it-forward by

establishing Meghann’s smile. We decided to use one of Caitlynn’s

pay-it-forward cards to begin Meghann’s SMILE and Random Act of

Kindness.In honor of Meghann and with Caitlynn’s beautiful soul
leading our way.

Meghann’s smile campaign has begun.

We are sending out many Random Act of Kindness cards to friends and
family. The only requirement to join in honoring Meghann is to

do something nice. Once you have put a smile of someone's face then
hand them a card so they can have fun by doing a Random Act of Kindness.
You can post your act of kindness on Meghann's Facebook or drop me
a note about it. I will post it (with or without your name) for you.
There are cards that you may print off on Meghann Marie Facebook

page. If you would like me to mail you some cards I would be more
than happy to send them. Private message me on Facebook, email,

or text.

https://www.facebook.com/MeghannMarie1987/

I want to thank everyone who has participated so far in Meghann Marie's
Random Act of Kindness and for all of those on Caitlynn's page who have

paved the way for us to join in.

A special THANK YOU to Kelly for inspiring us with Caitlynn's Random
Act of Kindness.

Here are a few thing that have been happening with Meghann Marie SMILE

campaign.

Students are being helped with school supplies, life threatening

medication has been purchased, yard work, food, meals, and many more

SMILES spread.

Remember you do not need to make it a monetary kindness. Kindness

may be helping someone shovel a sidewalk, reading to an unsighted

individual, or a kind word.

FYI-
In my next blog, I will be sharing something that I
have been working on for several years. I am excited
and nervous to put it out to the world.

Thursday, October 17, 2019

Happy Birthday to you. Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday dear....

Happy birthday to you !!! Happy Birthday to you!!! Happy Birthday dear…..

All of us are familiar with this song. Celebrating a birthday each year is one

thing we all have in common. It is the holiday that we celebrate by giving all

the attention to that one birthday boy or girl.

In June, my daughter, Meghann, would have celebrated her 32nd birthday. I

wanted to write a blog about her birthday earlier this summer, but I couldn’t do

it. It was too difficult for me to even write down what was going on in my head.

I probably would of scared everyone!!!

I was in Switzerland on Meghann’s birthday. I was thankful for this wonderful trip

with my husband, but it didn’t matter where I was or who I was with on her day.

Meghann is who I wanted to be with on June 27th. She was the only thing on my

mind. How could she not be on my mind? I carried her in me for 9 months.

Nobody on earth was closer to her than me and my heart will be forever broken.

I spent my life loving this little girl with all of my heart. It didn’t matter to me when

she was diagnosed with cerebral palsy. She was my sweet beautiful baby girl.

Cerebral Palsy did not stop Meghann from living a wonderful life. She was

entertaining, funny, loving, beautiful, and smart. I believe she was who she was

meant to be in this world.

Birthdays mean different things to people. We celebrate children’s birthday
with pride and enthusiasm. We celebrate the milestone birthdays happily and
sometimes with sadness. Whatever the age of your birthday remember it is your
day. The only holiday that is specifically for you to acknowledge your birth.

Every year for 30 years I spent celebrating Meghann’s birthday with her. For
many years, as soon as school was over for the summer she began talking about
her birthday. Meghann did not always have the concept of the traditional calendar
or clock time. If I described events coming up to her such as Christmas, Easter,
school, and her birthday. She got it!!! Meghann learned quickly that most holidays
meant she was going to get gifts!I know, we shouldn’t encourage materialism in our
kids, we should concentrate on the meaning of the holidays instead. And that’s fine.
I am not agreeing or disagreeing.

Great-grandma and Meghann

Meghann was the first grandchild on my side of the

family. Do I need to say anymore?

Meghann and I were lucky (and sometimes unlucky)

enough to live a few blocks from her grandma and

great-grandma. They saw Meghann every day!!

I am not kidding when I say they never missed a

day seeing her. Anyone who knew my grandma

or my mom will tell you they were obsessed with

Meghann and the feeling was mutual. When

Meghann had a birthday it was a holiday!!

Meg, Nena, and Peyton

Pop Pop and Meghann

Meg with lots of Curious George stuffed an

On Meghann's birthday she would

choose either Curious George or

Mickey/Minnie Mouse for her cake.

Although I did the traditional birthday

decorations of the character, Meghann

rarely cared about it. All she cared

about was seeing Nena and (great-

grandma) Mother. Then opening up

the new puzzles that she knew she

was getting. Curious George and

Mickey/Minnie Mouse were not the

only thing Meghann enjoyed.

SHE LOVED PUZZLES!!!

Meghann may not have known what time it was, but she knew if she was

gifted a puzzle twice. She made no secret of it either when they were

doubled. She would shove the puzzle in my face and loudly say, ”Uh oh!!”

She would continue to repeat this until I acknowledged, in front of the gift

giving person,

I would reluctantly tell her “Yes, Meghann you have that one already”

Meghann’s bluntness was a positive of cerebral palsy because forgiveness

from the gift giver was easily forgotten and laughed off.

One of the last puzzles Meg and I did together.

Meg with a pile of puzzles

Meg with Minnie Mouse

With a lot of persuasion from my sister, on Meghann’s upcoming 30th birthday
we threw her the biggest birthday ever!! My reluctance to throw Meghann a big
birthday party was the fact that we have lost most of our family in the area. My
sister and I talked about it for weeks. We decided to have it in the town Meghann
grew up in which was also where I had my hair salon.

At the time, Meghann had recently moved into a home with seven other girls that
was over an hour away from where she and I had lived. I hoped that enough
friends would show up to Meghann’s day. It was an understatement to say a few
people showed up.

Meghann's 30th birthday party

Terry is a friend/teachers at Richwoods High
School (where Meghann went to H.S.) that let
Meghann call him by his first name.
Even though the other kids had to call him
Mr. Quilty.
Meghann has known Terry since birth!!! I don't
think if Terry wanted Meg to call him Mr. Quilty
she would of listened.

Meghann's 30th birthday party

It was an unbelievable amount of people that celebrated with us. Meghann had the
best birthday party ever!! She had people come that she had not seen in years. It
was a wonderful day that none of us will ever forget. Meghann was showered with
gifts and love that day. She talked about it endlessly to us. Especially when we pulled
out all of the pictures that were taken on that day. Little did we know that this would
be the last birthday we celebrated with Meghann.

Meghann's 30th birthday Party. Thanks to Aunt V

Over the five weeks that I spent in the hospital with Meghann she talked about her

birthday. It was May, and she knew her birthday was coming soon. Those five weeks

were tough for Meghann. She had a tube inserted down her throat and removed

several times during those five weeks to help her breath. She wasn’t able to talk very

well each time they took the tube out. It would make her throat tender, and she would

whisper to me the birthday song. That is how Meghann would always communicate

her approaching birthday. She would sing Happy Birthday in her own way.

For five weeks I sat quietly in the hospital’s ICU unit beside Meghann’s bed holding

her hand. Throughout the day she would occasionally gain enough strength to softly

whisper the birthday song to me. I would assure her just as I did every year, that when

she got out of the hospital we would have another huge party for her. She would get

new puzzles, gifts, a cake, and lots of balloons.

Unfortunately, I made a promise that I didn’t get to keep. Meghann passed away on

May 24th, 2018.

Celebrate your birthday regardless if it is a milestone you welcome or not. Remember

it is the only holiday that is totally your day.

Abby and Kamal on Meghann's 31st/1st
Heavenly birthday

On Meghann's 31st birthday I

celebrated her first heavenly

birthday with the Abby, Kamal,

and Nana Crystal. I am sure

Meghann was smiling down on

all of us that day.

Birthday Celebration Pictures

Teenager!!!

84 years young

Happy Birthday

The Schultz family and Meghann

Tuesday, August 20, 2019

Be the kind kid

"You are dumb, you drool, your skin is a different color, you are a weirdo, careful
you might catch what they have, and go back where you came from. Of course,
we can’t forget the people who stare with their mouths wide open as if they are
seeing martians coming out of a UFO."

Those are a few negative comments that are spoken every day around us.

What can we do?

There is a lot we can do as parents, teachers, aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters, and

friends. Why not begin with educating our children with more than science, math,
reading, and english.

Acceptance and kindness can be taught and modeled by all of us.

My daughter, Meghann was diagnosed with cerebral palsy around 10 month old

and at 3 years old she began a preschool programj 50 miles from home.

Each year I worried if she would arrive safely, and if she was being treated fairly.

Every new school year would bring another group of children.

Many of those children who had NEVER been around a differently abled child.

Parents/Adults-

Children are little sponges. They will watch your reaction when you are

around a person with a different ability. Do not kid yourself that they are not

watching you.

I cannot tell you how many times I was out with Meghann that a child pointed

to Meghann’s wheelchair to only get hushed by a parent. This is NOT okay. It

is fine to allow your children to be curious about a child or person in a wheelchair.

Don’t make a wheelchair scary to them. Show them by example it is good to

interact with people who are in wheelchairs or different than them. You can be

a part of raising awareness and acceptance for all people.

Here is an example you may tell your child to help them understand unfamiliar

circumstances.

"Kids who have a disability may seem different and that doesn’t mean

they are bad or you can't be their friend. They may need to do things

differently such as using equipment like a wheelchair, or a device to

help them talk. I am sure you will find that they like to play just like

everyone else."

I once wrote a blog about the time a child asked me this question. “What’s

wrong with Meghann?” My answer was “Nothing is wrong with her. She was

born with cerebral palsy. Meghann learns a little slower and might take longer

to accomplish a task. She likes to have fun, and cries if she gets hurt, and will

get mad just like everyone."
The little girl sat down on the step beside Meghann and began talking to her
as if they were buddies forever.

I along with many parents of differently abled children want your child to approach us and
ask questions. (at the appropriate time) This is the first step to a better understanding and
erasing the mystery. It is also a chance for all of us to learn something new. After all inclusion
is on the rise in school classrooms. You need to be ready for your children to ask questions.
Statistics show discussing disabilities prepares a child to not give in to peer pressure or to go
along with teasing or bullying someone who is different.

If you are not sure what to tell your children. Here is another example
of something you can do with your child.

Make a list with your children what they have in common with the differently abled child.
Such as, they both will hurt when someone is mean to them, and laugh when something is
funny. Everyone wants to be included and to have friends.

I hope when you start making your lists for school supplies and shopping for
clothes that you will include discussions on acceptance and kindness in the
classroom. Encourage your child to be the kind kid this year. The one who gives
someone who doesn’t walk, talk, or looks different than them a chance for a new
friend.